One day to live

we have been living whole our life to everything right and do it in a right way, we have been planning our future and working our ass off to make sure the future is safe, secure, less of trouble. we are not only doing it for us but all the people pur life has been surrounded with family, friends etc...

we plan and work towrds to make our ends meet, but dont know when its gonna end... i am doing the same but suddenly things changed and now u know for a fact that I have only one more day to live...

what ones gonna do... as a world leader is this ur last chance to make the world a better place, as a drunked will u drink till the death or wont for a change or as a murderer u will confess for one last time for all the sins...

but what r u gonna do as an individual are u spend one last time with ur family and realise for the first time how imp they have been to you and what u meant for them but never said it till today. or u gonna go ahead with ur closest of friends and remember all the good times u have spend with them and laught till the end and wish we were together in the next life too or say things to each other what has never said before.

or spend the time with ur spouse and say I Love you for the last time and think when was the last time u said it to him/her from the heart and apprecait the sacrifices he/she have done for you.

spend the last few hours with the love ones and cry over the small things, or call all the people frineds u wanted to for the last time. even do all the wrong thngs which u knew were wrong but now u thought its cool to do it as a first and last time.

there are too many things one would like to do but i know for sure that the time will be running short in any case..

i know i couldnt do much but wish one thing the last one day to live goes on for a life time...............

love

one of the most talked about discussion in anyone life, right from love from opposite sex to friends but rarely we talk love from family... thats ok i am not here to talk abt that.

love to me has always been received a lot but very rarely from few and rarely from many. confusing...
recd from few means family (immediade) and very close close best friends they know that and very rarely from many means i have lots of friends and aquintance and have been there for me a long time but does it really mean love.. i am not substituting the term friendship. u have friends friendship is there but very rarely u love the person (in some case sexual and for lots non-sexual way)

love is a next step of/in friendship if u attain that its upon both if you how u retain it then its like being couple and long term relationship u need to follow it for a lifetime.. i love some of my friends and they know it, and the ones i dont they know they i have offered them too bit they might not take it or realise it so thats ok its like not going for committment.

i recd a lots of love from 2 ex of mine both for a short period and both have been a wonderful experience for me and for them right from love to coffee to the end. its been a complete journey with lots of emotions, organism, anger, patience, etc etc..

i do recommend one shoud definately have such an adventure, see even if u break up u will not have her right but... if u dont go for it u never had anyone so what stops us to take the next step. i have taken lots of steps and have fallen down almost all the times but then i need to get up again and walk right.. so guys plse dont stop oneself to fall down and ride again. i miss doing that may i have lost confidence, tired of falling but i guess i still miss/not forgot/love *******
(guess the name)

i am talking abt my first ex second one i dont care now, but for first i somehow still miss her a lot, miss that long long chat, her smile her laught, havg coffee talks, hearts sinks when she cries, miss that she is not part of my present well we thought it would be be.. had a chance i guess i want her back but she has moved on... and the guy who has moved on in life has not... saw her snao last night and all the memories came back.. ... laughter and cries.....

thats why i am writing this... if u know that u can love someone for a lifetime than dont stop ur self of expressing it be friends or opposite sex one needs more than just friends. if the other one does not respond make him/her read this blog too

well i sign off... with this thought i hope i can start and complete my next blog
I wish u were here.....

tonight why i wanna cry

(apologies that i am trying to rhyme some para, guess mind is not in place as my heart is speaking this, plse bare)

I dont know the reason i dont know why
but tonight I feel that i wanna cry .

its not that i miss home and it will be time till i fly
nor its the reason i had to say lot of good bye
back home family and friends always wish good in my life
I just dont want to disappoint them as they think good of me and high

my parents love is missing and brother never called in dont why
keep thinking whay they would be doing now wonder thinking abt them will make me cry
I still keep talking to them I know they also feel like to cry
But guess its nice to keep the emotions to themselves as then i would cry.

Missing my friends few very spl few best and rest dont care where did i go
Guess they just want to see my mail first then decide do we miss likes he does, so
when they reply as a favour my heart hurts deeply i wished i didnt send them a mail in first go
but guess i am a 'nice guy' and i will again let it go

thinking about my love life i dont know how till date i survived
giving my heart to many but only 2 have realised
my love was tru to them and i would one day make them my wife
but soon they falled apart and rest just didnt feel like as I was only a friend i why the love within then didt realise

feeling all those things above my heart goes out to cry, i didnt achieve any thing great professionally
at time i feel jealous of friends who earned more and heart again wanna cry
its not that I am not happy for them but pissed that i think that some of them will say its human and some will say its ok

Tonight i wanna cry thinking for those i miss the most today, i wanna cry tonight for all the failures and sucess i have attained.
I wanna cry tonight as my heart feels the pain after all the good i have done the effort goes down in vain
I wanna cry tonight for my lost love, i guess i didnt fight enough as i would rather right make love (with her)

Guess cries for later as these dont seem reason to cry, still feel very happy that life gave me which will never make me cry.

Mom-Dad-Friends miss u and love u



p.s. not drunk, just thought to write some crap i guess
I am cool and good. no worries.
Take care.

D.

Friends

if u talk to anybody and some time or other they will talk about their friends or will take a reference topic and tell about their friends.

well its good to know about them, i have a lots of them too. but i never descriminate betwee
n good, best, pals, close etc... for me its just friends rather they are names, identities and relationship for me. i have also have experiences that i have done everything for them
and have never asked anything in return but at times and for few people i dont get anything in return. it should not feel bad as a friend but friendship is a 2 way prfrocess and if u dont receive the same gesture back it hurts me and most of the time they will be people who will talk on friendship as they are best but they are not.


friends for me are everything, this is place where i can share anything, talk anything and most importantly be myself. a place where i free my mind most importantly fee my heart. very few friends know what friendship means to me and most importantly what i mean to them. its not just being in touch(its how u touch then in a non sexual way).

what i dont understand is why u continously need to make an effort and prove a point by an action that i am a friend, if i am damn it why question?

i am not drunk now but i say this " there is no checklist or a process note or manual how friends are to be" so dont ever try to find out whats a perfect friendship or tell how it should be. be happy with way we are, i am not perfect nor are u.

if you like me the way i am, so do i like u the way u r.

i love all my friends and they place a special place and will always be spl all my life, life is a journey and adventure with them, hope u can be aboard with any reservations...